Wednesday, January 13, 2010

A Piece of the Past

In trying to "organize" my home, I came across the box of photos that my mom had given to me.  When I got the box originally I looked at a few photos on top and then put it away on a shelf to collect dust.  I pulled it out on a day off, since there was no going outside with the freezing weather that Texas has been having for the past week (again climate warming, my butt!).  I started sifting thru the box, pulling out photos of myself when I had red hair, old classmates and family members in their youth.  Each photo representing a moment in time, a glimpse of the past, a represention of who I was and who I become. 

I came across a piece of paper that was at one time a bright yellow, but faded over time to pale yellow.  It was folded in half and then half again to just let a poem that I had penned called, Dear Grandfather be the only one seen. There is a mark that had soaked through the layers of the fold probably from something spilled, but at this present time I have no clue.  There is no date or stamp to clue me into the age but I am guessing that I wrote this in 4th or 5th grade.

It is about my mom's dad, the only grandfather that I can remember.  First let me clarify that when I speak of my parents, the ones that raised me, my mom and dad but on a family tree they would be my maternal grandparents and if they had not told me the truth I would have never known the difference.  I have detailed memories of my grandfather even though he past on when I was very young.  I remember how tall he was, the walks we would take around the farm and sitting on the arm of his chair as he told stories and joked with me.  I remember him getting sick very quickly and being upset because the hospital staff would not let me into see him and how upset I was at my mom for not making them bend the rules.  I know exactly where is grave is to this day even though I have not visited it in over 20 years. Thinking about this now, I have a profound sadness that I am fighting.  It is amazing that this man, who was in my life for only a short period of time would leave such a deep, ingrained impact on me that I can easily remember such vivid details.  I guess that is why when I was given an assignment to write a Letter Poem that I chose to write to him. Because of the dark spot I will re-write the poem so all can read it.

Dear Grandfather

I miss you so much.
I miss our long talks.
You always understood me.
I miss our rides to the Cottage Cafe,
where you would buy me my favorite
chocolate ice cream cones.
You never let me grow up too fast
and you where always there when I needed you.
I told you, "I Love You," all the time but
the time you needed it most
was the time it was too late and
you were gone as fast as blowing out a candle.
You'll always be in my heart and
nothing can shatter that memory
of me, you and our moments.
I miss you, Grandfather.
Your first Granddaughter,
La Nora


  1. This is an amazing poem. I love "you were gone as fast as blowing out a candle." Very touching. I have my mom's diary but it makes me laugh. She wrote about spending one day being a rebel. Who lives as a rebel for one day?

    (thank god it wasn't some youtube video..hehe :P)

  2. Our loved ones are alive in our memories. It's painful and comforting at the same time. I can still hear my mother's nagging, ahem, advice today. And dear Julie, that youtube video is cool!!


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